Can soap get dirty?

In response to last week’s question, "Can soap get dirty?",  my writing and sailing friend Rich quipped, "Oh yeah!"  to this my transportation friend Joe added, "Depends on who is holding the soap."  My social media friend Mark then expounded, "It depends on who is using it and where and why." 

My temple friend Richard observed, "Yes, soap can get dirty. Then it is called a “soap opera” if shown on daytime television or “reality television” if it airs in the evening. Every vice known to mankind (and a few with which we may not even be familiar) makes a guest appearance on those shows."  This would explain my equestrian friend Royce's reply, "Of course."

My dad's beach buddy Bob shared, "That's the point, to get the dirty out."  Chris, another transportation friend pointed out it's "only the white bars."  To this, my engineering friend Steve observed, "Ever seen that bar of soap at your mechanics? Hell yes!"

My cousin Wes recalled, "If not, what was Mother thinking when she used it wash out dirty words?   To this, my cycling friend Ted concluded, "Didn't you ever get your mouth washed out with soap as a kid? That stuff sure did not taste clean!! And, as the Zoo Keeper of 2 teenagers, the question of clean or dirty soap becomes irrelevant when they don't use it!"

Please share your thoughts about this week's "things that make you go 'Hmmm' “:

What is the opposite of planning?

"Life may not be the party we had hoped for, but while we're here we should dance."

Hal

Thanks to Demetri Martin, Steven Wright and George Carlin for the inspiration for Hmmm.  Stop by www.nichelabs.com to see what else I'm up to.

     

How can the IRS be less taxing?

In response to last week’s question, "How can the IRS be less taxing?", my writing and sailing friend Rich suggested that, "It would be less taxing if they had to be nice and competent like a  good waiter and earn their percentage of my check.  A large glass of wine and nice piece of fish wouldn’t hurt either."  

My neighbor Al noted, "That's an interesting deduction" while my engineering friend Steve advised simply, "By shutting down!"

My social media friend Mark pointed out, "If they taxed us less, we would find life in the ole' USA even more taxing, when all the good programs get cut that we are too selfish to pay for on our own. So I guess my answer is that 'they' could be less taxing if they taxed us more and we got more 'free' stuff that we already feel entitled to."    To this, my cousin Wes offered, "Be low income and get an earned income tax credit. Otherwise pay more. Your schedule of medical exclusion went up to 10% from 7.5%. Remember Obama loves the middle class family…at least their tax dollars.

My cycling friend Ted quipped, "As one who is binge watching the Sopranos on Amazon Prime, I have a new take on how to solve problem. I'll get Tony on it right away!"

And my cousin Dave lamented, "Pretty amazing that Federal Tax was only implemented in 1913 and it was simple to figure out.   Guess what I was working on last Monday?  My taxes."

Please share your thoughts about this week's "things that make you go 'Hmmm' “:

Can soap get dirty? (from my neighbor Al)

We don't stop laughing because we get old. We get old because we stop laughing.  Make it a priority to have fun and make others laugh.

Hal

Thanks to Demetri Martin, Steven Wright and George Carlin for the inspiration for Hmmm.  Stop by www.nichelabs.com to see what else I'm up to.

     

With baseball season starting, what happens if you wear dark clothes and sit in the bleachers? + a Tax Day question

In response to last week’s question, "With baseball season starting, what happens if you wear dark clothes and sit in the bleachers?" my equestrian friend Royce replied, "You get very HOT!" which my writing friend Stan revised to be, "You shvitz." 

And my temple friend Richard expanded on that, "If you sit in the bleachers wearing dark clothes in June, July, or August, you will sweat a lot, and you won’t smell very good. However, since the Braves has now traded away almost every major leaguer on their roster, nobody else will be sitting in the bleachers, so no one will be offended. When the Braves were winning and the bleachers are full, it smelled like bacon frying in coconut oil!"

My neighbor Al asked, "Isn't that why the stadiums sort the fans in sections?"

My dad's beach buddy Bob worried, "If I were dark clothes, they would probably use me to clean he seats.  If I wear dark clothes I would be regarded as a preacher praying for the kids smoking pot."  My St George's friend Bruce also noticed the typo, "…didn't graduate from third grade?   WHERE vs. WEAR.   Im just happy that here it is opening day and the Cubbies are only ONE game out of first place in their division!"

My sailing friend Norm  suggested, "Wear all black, but for a white baseball glove. Sit in the outfield or somewhere foul balls may land.  When you catch a ball, to the TV audience, it will appear (actually not appear) as only a glove with no body caught the ball!"

My cousin Wes shared, "Where are my dark clothes? Since the question is asked , I expect what will happen is a full body sunburn.  If I find and wear them, I will just get hot.  It is a good idea for a Rockies' home opener." 

…or maybe you don't get hot because the bleach makes dark clothes light?

Please share your thoughts about this week's "things that make you go 'Hmmm' “: 

How can the IRS be less taxing?

We don't stop laughing because we get old. We get old because we stop laughing.  Make it a priority to have fun and make others laugh.

Hal

FYI: In 1913, Wyoming ratified the 16th Amendment, providing the three-quarter majority of states necessary to amend the Constitution. The 16th Amendment gave Congress the authority to enact an income tax. That same year, the first Form 1040 appeared after Congress levied a 1 percent tax on net personal incomes above $3,000 with a 6 percent surtax on incomes of more than $500,000.  Might one say that it's been downhill since then? (www.irs.gov/uac/Brief-History-of-IRS)

Thanks to Demetri Martin, Steven Wright and George Carlin for the inspiration for Hmmm.  Stop by www.nichelabs.com to see what else I'm up to.

     

What is the proper etiquette in the buffet line? and a baseball question

In response to last week’s question, "What is the proper etiquette in the buffet line?",  my birthday bud Jon wrote, "It’s all right there in the name—don’t 'cut' before others 'et.'"

My St. George friend Bruce advise, "No more than two HANDFULS of mashed potatoes..."

My twenty-something cousin Greg declared, "If I’m present its every man (or woman) for themselves. :-)  "   To this, my cycling friend Ted added, "Elbows, it's all in the elbows, and perhaps a few colorful metaphors!"

My writing and sailing friend Rich recommended, "Pork products on the left, beef products in the middle, chicken products on the right, OKthat takes care of the protein, now on to the bread……"   To this, my transportation friend Joe spelled out, "Large plate – left hand.  Large plate – right hand.  Dessert plate on your belly.  Admit it; If you eat at buffets on a regular basis there is ample room for at least one dessert plate."

My dad's beach buddy Bob recalled, "I left the military because I didn't like the long lines for everything so I now wait until the lines is gone before I go help myself and clean up what is left."

My hiking friend Kelly analyzed the situation as, "There is no buffet etiquette!  It’s a weird, backwards law of the jungle where the fat and weak dominate by physically occupying the most space thereby keeping others away from the precious bucket of mac & cheese."  And my social media friend Mark replied, "I always focus on NOT looking at the sneeze guard. Not sure if that is etiquette, or just self-serving!"

And then my equestrian friend Royce suggested, "Avoid them and there won't be a problem."

Please share your thoughts about this week's "things that make you go 'Hmmm' “: 

With baseball season starting, what happens if you where dark clothes and sit in the bleachers?  (from my cycling friend Ted)

We don't stop laughing because we get old. We get old because we stop laughing.  Make it a priority to have fun and make others laugh.

Hal

If you're a baseball player, check out my friend Ivan and Melly's business at http://insidebaseball.com/

Thanks to Demetri Martin, Steven Wright and George Carlin for the inspiration for Hmmm.  Stop by www.nichelabs.com to see what else I'm up to.