Is it more fun when you can't see clearly?

In response to last week’s question, "Is it more fun when you can't see clearly?," my writing and sailing friend Rich wrote simply, "Clearly," while my IT friend Kosol shared, "Yes it is exciting when you can't see clearly. When I don't have my contacts in or glasses on, just like life, I'll never know who I'll run into or grab." 

My media mogul friend Bill cautioned, "It depends on the reason that you can't see clearly," to which my birthday bud Jon concurred, "Depends why.  I sort of recall that being fun.  Years ago…….."   My cycling friend Ted added, "As a college frat boy--absolutely!! As a middle aged dude who has to wear those stupid reading glasses-no way!"

To this, my temple friend Tracey advised, "Only in the moment. After that the hindsight thing gets in the way."

When my neighbor Al  replied, "Not at the beach..." my hiking friend Kelly qualified this, referencing last week's answer, "Yes, It is when non-statuesque people are running around nude."

My PR friend Stan recalled, "Being nearsighted, no. Hallucinogens could be another story."  And my sailing friend Norm shared, "In college we turned off the lights for a reason !! Definitely more fun in the dark when you can't see all the details." 

My networking friend Andrew counseled, "I will reiterate Coach Eric Taylor's famous words from "Friday Night Lights"--"Clear eyes, full hearts, can't lose!"

My temple friend Vivian proclaimed, "Sometimes being in a fog (mentally) is very advantageous," to which my equestrian friend Royce noted, "There have been times when the answer is yes. But one has to consider that the mind was clouded from way too many adult beverages."

My cousin Greg queried, "But how will I know the rain is gone?"

And my cousin Wes chuckled, "For me, I find the fun in clearly watching the unclear stumble and bumble around."

Please send me your thoughts about this week's "things that make you go 'Hmmm' “:

When is labor a labor of love?

The happiest people don't have the best of everything. They just make the best of everything.

Hal

To my Atlanta friends and others who are in Atlanta on Labor Day weekend, please join me on Sun or Mon at Noshfest -- a community event of Jewish food and fun, including a bagel eating contest.  Click here for Noshfest details.

Thanks to Demetri Martin, Steven Wright and George Carlin for the inspiration for Hmmm.   I invite you to call or email me so  I can share what  I'm up to.

We allow naked statues outside and in art museums. Should we allow people to do the same?

In response to last week’s question, "We allow naked statues outside and in art museums.  Should we allow people to do the same?," my social media friend Mark purported, "Yes, but I will be the curator. Like art, some people just do not belong on view."   Yet my organizational behavior guru Marya preferred, "I'm all for freedom, but I'll take a little surprise too.  ;-)  "

My dad's beach buddy Bob observed, "We do.  Ever take a stroll down Broadway in NY?" which recalled my technology friend Gary and me having a similar experience with the annual Bay-to-Breakers run in San Fran.

My engineering cousin Dave simply said, "No," which my cycling friend Ted endorsed, "Naked Americans are not a pretty site these days! I vote no!"  Then my temple friend Tracey added, "Ew! Just ew, because those that are the least 'artistic' when nude would be the most likely to strut their 'art.' "

My temple friend Richard suggested, "Only if they have perfect bodies and are willing to paint themselves white and stand perfectly still while the pigeons poop on them.  Of course, during the winter, their skin would turn blue, which could be a problem. Might need another coat of white paint!"

My sister-in-law and sailor Lorrie cautioned, "Um, the answer is obvious:  if all men looked like the David and all women looked like Venus de Milo only with arms, there would be no problem with folks walking around naked."  To this, my hiking friend Kelly concurred, "Only if they have roughly the same physique as the naked statues!  Of course, there’s plenty of room for interpretation there.  For example, few have the buff torso of Michelangelo’s David, but many of us resemble David in another key aspect…   (Should I request anonymity for that one?)."

Please send me your thoughts about this week's "things that make you go 'Hmmm' ":

Is it more fun when you can't see clearly?

The happiest people don't have the best of everything. They just make the best of everything.

Hal

To my Atlanta friends and others who are in Atlanta on Labor Day weekend, please join me on Sun or Mon at Noshfest -- a community event of Jewish food and fun, including a bagel eating contest.  Click here for Noshfest details.

Thanks to Demetri Martin, Steven Wright and George Carlin for the inspiration for Hmmm.   I invite you to call or email me so  I can share what  I'm up to.

How long does Summer last?,

In response to last week’s question, "How long does Summer last?," my sailing friend Norm concluded, "Never long enough unless you are in the BVI's!"

My temple friend Tracey lamented, "When you are a woman of a certain age, it's lasts 365 days per year.... 366 this year!" to which my cuckoo clock friend Jodie agreed, "Too long!"

My writing and sailing friend Rich, sees things differently when he responded, " Forever!" and provided validation from the Beach Boys:  Their  album titled "Endless Summer." 

My equestrian friend Royce called out, "Until you decide it's too cold to swim naked" to which my dad's beach buddy Bob added, " The Summer ends when the  heat leaves and the last of the summer visitors decide to go home."

My temple friend Richard observed, "Officially, September 21. In reality, it ends when the kids go back to school. At that point, no one is going to neighborhood pool, so there’s need for it to be so damned hot!"

Please send me your thoughts about this week's "things that make you go 'Hmmm' “:

We allow naked statues outside and in art museums.   Should we allow people to do the same?  (from my sailing friend Tim)

The happiest people don't have the best of everything. They just make the best of everything.

Hal

Thanks to Demetri Martin, Steven Wright and George Carlin for the inspiration for Hmmm.   I invite you to call or email me so  I can share what  I'm up to.

What does the speed in which a woman says 'nothing' when asked 'What's wrong?' indicate?

In response to last week’s question, "What does the speed in which a woman says 'nothing' when asked 'What's wrong?' indicate?," my sister-in-law Lorrie counseled, "Haven't you guys figured it out that it is not how fast she responds but how she responds.  Sweetly - watch out.  Matter of factly - not a problem.  A little on the pissy side - double watch out."   To this, my collaboration friend Tricia advised, "If I say nothing without hesitation, one should worry a bit. If I say 'nothing' in a sentence with other descriptive words, it's ok. :-)    Why do we do this?  It is our special power and we know this is confusing to you guys, and we measure the response, when used quickly. Always choose the next comment carefully!!"

My HIPAA compliance friend Karla then suggested, "You have to ask 3 times and on the 3rd time you will get the actual answer."   Then my birthday bud Jon shared, "Nothing, my wife said immediately."

From the guys' perspective, my writing and sailing friend Rich observed, "The speed of her reply is directly proportional to the intensity of her unhappiness with you," to which my neighbor Al  concluded, "The severity of the event, or your mistake, is exponentially proportional to the response interval. (Example:  What's wrong dear? ... Nothing! (said with the snap of a buggy whip)  However, it can also be inversely proportional if the offense is reminiscent of something you might have done say 25 years ago. (Example:  What's wrong dear? ........ pause ....... pause ....... pause........ Nothing. (said with a loathing sneer that will make Lucifer himself beg forgiveness.)"   My temple friend Lesley offered the visual, "As a graph, it would be an exponential curve with rate of speech on the x-axis and the pissed off factor on the y-axis."

My networking friend Andrew noted that "if she answers quickly, you have done something wrong. If she answers slowly, you have also done something wrong. If she doesn't answer at all, you have REALLY done something VERY wrong."  My temple friend Bob noted "If she says it slow, she's upset.  If she says it fast, she's really pissed off." 

My cycling friend Ted  pointed out, "The speed of the response is directly proportional to the need for the Man Cave where no women may enter!," to which my social media friend Mark recommended, "It means absolutely nothing. It is a trap. RUN! RUN FAST! ANYWHERE, JUST GET OUT!"

My temple friend Richard revealed, "The quicker she says 'Nothing,' the longer the snorkel you will need, because it indicates the depth to which you are buried in a big pile of “fertilizer.”   FYI:  The key to a happy marriage for a man is knowing 3 – and only 3 – key phrases:

1)     “Yes, dear. You are right.”

2)     “I’m sorry.”

3)     “Oh.” (Used to stall for time while trying to figure out whether phrase 1 or phrase 2 applies to your particular situation.)  “Oh” is also important because it is incredibly flexible and can mean many different things. Some examples:

<> “Oh?” – “I’m confused?” “I’m surprised.”.

<> “Oh!”  -- “OK, I get it now.”

<> “Ooooooooohhh.” – “I understand where I screwed up.”

When my cousin Wes replied, "Ut oh," my equestrian friend Royce declared, "Avoid asking the question, dummy."

Please send me your thoughts about this week's "things that make you go 'Hmmm' “:

How long does Summer last?

Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, wine in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO HOO what a ride!"

Hal

You know you're in the South if school is back in session.  And that means football can't be far behind.

Thanks to Demetri Martin, Steven Wright and George Carlin for the inspiration for Hmmm.   I invite you to call or email me so  I can share what  I'm up to.

If you intend to live forever, how are you doing?

In response to last week’s question, "If you intend to live forever, how are you doing?," my temple friend Richard observed, "On track so far, with no end in sight.  Of course, working 50 hours/week makes it seem longer anyway."   My dad's beach buddy Bob, who has made enough trips around the sun to retire, replied, "Got a pretty good jump on it so far."

And my equestrian friend Royce quoted "that great Greek philosopher, Zorba:" A man like me should live a 1000 years". I have 925 to go! "

One other thought: Every day I set another record for myself.

Please send me your thoughts about this week's "things that make you go 'Hmmm' “:

What does the speed in which a woman says "nothing" when asked "What's wrong?" indicate?

Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, wine in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO HOO what a ride!"

Hal

Thanks to Demetri Martin, Steven Wright and George Carlin for the inspiration for Hmmm.   I invite you to call or email me so  I can share what  I'm up to.