Who makes the best promises?

In response to last week’s imponderable question, “Who makes the best promises?,”  my physicist and disc golf friend Blake concluded, “Gravity. It will always let you down.”

My neighbor Al declared, “Conopco  A division of Unilever.” (You thought Promise spread and Promise Extra Light margarine were made by a family dairy?)

My temple friend Leslie recalled, “Yes, and he is still standing on first after all of these years.  (reference to Abbott and Castello that initially missed; kudos to Leslie)

My collaboration and running friend Andy  observed, ”I'm pretty sure Brown's fans would say Bud Light.” My adjunct executive friend Lindy continued, “Probably advertisers –Nestles (makes the very best…chocolate), Jewelers, etc. Who are we to disagree with all the Best Ever, New and Improved promises they share?:

My dad’s beach buddy Bob called out, “Mafia Dons.  You can bet your last shovel of dirt in your grave on it.  Santa comes in second.”

My birthday bud Jon knew simply, “Liars.”  To this, my cousin Greg opined, “Any politician in an election year,” to which my sailing friend Norm added, “Politicians as you did not ask who KEEPS the best promises!

My cycling friend Ted proffered, “Santa to a Jewish kid--I promise you will get no xmas present!’

And my business development friend Ray counseled, “Those who don't break them!”

Please send me your thoughts about this week's "things that make you go 'Hmmm' ":

How do you make a decision when you are in the dark?*

Lord, give me a sense of humor; give me the ability to understand a clean joke; to get some humor out of life, and to pass it on to other folks. 

Hal

*Fri, Dec 21 is the longest night of the year aka Winter Solstice.  Lots of dark.  In Nome, AL, the sun will rise at 12:02pm and set at 3:57pm (20 hr, 6min of night), which is 17 hours, 33 minutes longer than June’s Summer Solstice.  Always looking for the bright side, that means that on Saturday, the days start getting longer, and there is only 90 days until Spring.

Thanks to Demetri Martin, Steven Wright and George Carlin for the inspiration for Hmmm.   I invite you to call or email me to catch up.

If veggies like Romaine lettuce are better for you than chocolate, how come there haven’t been any recalls for chocolate?

In response to last week’s imponderable question, “If veggies like Romaine lettuce are better for you than chocolate, how come there haven’t been any recalls for chocolate?,”  my interfaith community friend Ann declared, “Because no sane person would throw away chocolate; they'd all gamble that theirs was ok,” to which my dad’s beach buddy Bob concluded, “Because there are never any leftovers.”  My cycling friend Ted, who is also a dentist, added, “If they were to recall chocolate, we would eat it anyway, deadly or not! So why bother?”  

My writing and sailing friend Rich challenged, “I reject the premise that veggies are better for you – One pound of romaine lettuce is 80 calories – One pound of chocolate is 2476 calories – The average man needs 2500 calories per day to maintain – One pound of chocolate or 31 plus pounds of romaine for the same caloric intake  -  There are no recalls on chocolate because chocolate is way more efficient than romaine and tastier too.”

My social media friend Mark shared, “I recall all chocolate almost immediately after I swallow. Too late to do any good, but I try! Every time.”

Please send me your thoughts about this week's "things that make you go 'Hmmm' ":

Who makes the best promises?

Lord, give me a sense of humor; give me the ability to understand a clean joke; to get some humor out of life, and to pass it on to other folks. 

Hal

If you know an individual or small business wanting to break the cycle of rising healthcare costs, please introduce me.  With so many people trying to figure out Open Enrollment and questioning these new ‘short term medical’ plans, I can share some solid advice.

Thanks to Demetri Martin, Steven Wright and George Carlin for the inspiration for Hmmm.   I invite you to call or email me to catch up.

With Thanksgiving a recent memory, are there left-unders or right-overs?

In response to last week’s imponderable question, “With Thanksgiving a recent memory, are there left-unders or right-overs?,” my writing and sailing friend Rich observed, “Right overs are when you take your leftover lean turkey breast and turn it into a healthy salad.  Left-unders are when you take the pie out of the fridge, a spoon out the drawer, get under the covers and don’t come out until there is no more pie or self-esteem.”

My cycling friend Ted explained, “The left unders are the pieces of turkey left under the table for the 4 legged vacuum, and the right overs is the cranberry sauce in the back of the fridge that your wife says ‘It’s right over on the 2nd shelf on the right; if it were a snake it would have bit you!’"

My production management friend Ray agreed, “For those dishes we don't like, those are left under the table (actually did this as a child as a way to avoid eating one of my aunt's awful brussel sprouts one Thanksgiving) and then there are others we pass right over, usually to the person sitting to our right or left at the dining room table.”

My adjunct executive friend Lindy replied, “I’m sure dogs hope for left-unders, which is why they camp under the table. Right-overs would be dishes (in my case a pie) that didn’t turn out right and we have more holidays coming to try again.

Please send me your thoughts about this week's "things that make you go 'Hmmm' ":

If veggies like Romaine lettuce are better for you than chocolate, how come there haven’t been any recalls for chocolate?

Lord, give me a sense of humor; give me the ability to understand a clean joke; to get some humor out of life, and to pass it on to other folks. 

Hal

If you know an individual or small business wanting to break the cycle of rising healthcare costs, please introduce me.  With so many people trying to figure out Open Enrollment and questioning these new ‘short term medical’ plans, I can share some solid advice.

Thanks to Demetri Martin, Steven Wright and George Carlin for the inspiration for Hmmm.   I invite you to call or email me to catch up.

What are you thankful for about people who are different than you?

In response to last week’s imponderable question, “What are you thankful for about people who are different than you?,” my writing and sailing friend Rich pointed out, “Because it does in fact take a village and that includes the village idiot to blaze the ‘don’t go that way path.’ To the rest of the village I can only say ‘you’re welcome’.”

My wife Alison replied, “Thankful for their sharing!” to which my equestrian friend Royce added, “Diversity makes us all better persons.”  My college roomie John then explained, “Differences introduce us to new experiences, adds diversity, yet we still find out that in many ways we are the same and we do have many things to be grateful for.”

My production manager friend Ray pontificated, “Each person is unique, thus different from anyone else. And yet, each person being unique means that we all are the same, that is, we are all unique. It is being samely unique that allows us to be individuals, but at the same time to be a family known as mankind. And for that I am truly thankful. As we said so many centuries ago, the first moment of dawn is when you can look into the eyes of another human being and see yourself.   As to the glass being half-full or half-empty, I don't look at it either way. I just know that it's refillable.  Namaste my friend and what a unique person you are.”

My dad’s beach buddy Bob explained, “Much depends on where the differences are.  Appearance makes it challenging and interesting.  Philosophically and politically depends on the perceived solution to life's problems.”

One of our Ecumenical Thanksgiving speakers Tom shared, “My grandfather told me, ‘If everyone was the same, they’d all be in love with your grandmother.’”

My sailing friend Glenn lamented, “Missed this one.  From the discussion on bingeing, I blacked out again.”

Please send me your thoughts about this week's "things that make you go 'Hmmm' ":

With Thanksgiving a recent memory, are there left-unders or right-overs?

Lord, give me a sense of humor; give me the ability to understand a clean joke; to get some humor out of life, and to pass it on to other folks. 

Hal

My insightful friend Dr. Dwana shared a reply to “who pays?’, “NOT the one who starts their order with ‘We’ll have separate checks!’” 

Thanks to Demetri Martin, Steven Wright and George Carlin for the inspiration for Hmmm.   I invite you to call or email me to catch up.

Can you be over-saturated?

In response to last week’s imponderable question, “Can you be over-saturated?,” my birthday bud Jon concluded, “That would be a very unique situation,” while my cousin Valarie explained, “Being over-saturated is as feasible as giving 110 percent--impossible but quite common in our exaggerated vernacular.”

My writing and sailing friend Rich shared, “Tequila tends to over saturate my filters,” to which my social media friend Mark admitted, “It’s been a while, but I remember drinking much more than humanly possible in college...more than a few times.”

My college roomie John requested, “At the risk of being political, I believe we are over-saturated with coverage of the orange clown in DC.   Can the media please boycott him and just cover other news worthy items?”

My cycling friend Ted, who is also a private pilot, advised, “Reading lots of NTSB reports on how people die in airplanes, task over saturation can be quite lethal in a cockpit. Just don't bother your pilot when s/he's really busy- you will over saturate him/her.”

And my equestrian friend Royce pointed out, “Shouldn't that be ‘overly’ saturated?”

Please send me your thoughts about this week's "things that make you go 'Hmmm' ":

What are you thankful for about people who are different than you?

Lord, give me a sense of humor; give me the ability to understand a clean joke; to get some humor out of life, and to pass it on to other folks. 

Hal

Wishing you, your family, friend, and friends you haven’t met, a memorable holiday break.  We have more than enough to be thankful for.  If you can realize that ‘your cup is more than half full,’ then you realize we have much to be grateful for.  Yes, there is plenty to do to improve our world; the good news is that when we work together, like building a Habitat for Humanity home, clean-up a river, or help kids read, we all benefit.

Thanks to Demetri Martin, Steven Wright and George Carlin for the inspiration for Hmmm.   I invite you to call or email me to catch up.