What do you plant to get seedless watermelon or seedless grapes?

In response to last week’s question,  “What do you plant to get seedless watermelon or seedless grapes?”,  my friend Swany recommended, “In vitro watermelon or grapes.”  My writing and sailing friend Rich replied, “A vasectomy plant.”   My friend Chris, who worked with Swany and me, countered, writing, “spontaneous mutation, kind of like spontaneous combustion but without so much heat.”

My neighbor Al declared, “Everyone knows that you plant seedless seeds to get seedless watermelons and grapes.” My dad’s beach buddy Bob added, “Both with no success.”

My videographer friend Ivan set out to find the answer. “I believe you just need a seedy farmer. No, wait, that would not work, farmers are outstanding citizens. (Out standing in their fields anyway.) You can spay and neuter a dog or cat, I guess it is like that, only with a watermelon.  I bought a seedless watermelon to study this problem, but I ate my homework.  Dang, now I am going to be up all night trying to figure this one out.”

My sailing friend Mike helpfully offered, “While WHAT you plant is important, so is WHO you get to plant it:  Claude Rains of course!”

And then my golden retriever rescue friend, Kate, challenged, “Nothing - they all have seeds and, like every other person in this world, the grocers and grocery chain marketers just lie to you.”

Please share your thoughts about "things that make you go 'Hmmm' “:

Who determines normal?

Life  is too short for drama and petty things, so kiss slowly, laugh insanely, love truly, and forgive  quickly.

Hal

To the 100+ volunteers that made Nosh Fest such a success in our community --- the food, entertainment, crafts  and kibitzing – thank you for making this a fun weekend.  And to my wife Alison, for all of her support and advice, and to Barbara, for being an ideal co-chair.