f the other 2/3 of the world were Christian, could Santa still deliver everything on one night?

In response to last week’s question, “If the other 2/3 of the world were Christian, could Santa still deliver everything on one night?”, my friend Richard confidently explained, “Yes, Santa would have to enlist the aid of Subordinate Clauses.”  To this, my 2^nd cousin Greg clarified, “He would use Federelf Express.” And my friend

Tracey declared, “Of course he could! Duh! He's Santa Claus.” However, my dad’s beach buddy Bob cautioned, “All depends on the nature of the gifts....if a skimpy nighty ... Hmmm.”

My cousin Wes imagined, “Certainly!  Provided Santa's helpers (Mommy and Daddy) can afford to help or some other Santa helper organization steps up (Toys for Tots etc).    Maybe if Santa delivered to those other  2/3's of the people, we might have more peace on earth and goodwill among men.”

My friend Bruce concluded, “Yes he could, unless he gets employed by the U.S. Postal Service and needs 2-3 days for delivery and Saturdays off.”

My friend Kevin thought, “Well, probably not.  But it does remind me that we had to explain to our boys that Santa isn't anti-Semitic.”  My pilot friend Ted further explained, “There was once some geeky engineering type who calculated Santa's speed and trajectory if he were to hit every house on Christmas eve. He would have to be traveling 2-3x the speed of light. As we know from Einstein's calculations, nothing can travel faster than the speed of light, therefore there is no Santa.”

And then my friend Swany clarified it all, writing “Santa can and will deliver all gifts however the new gift policy will be instituted:

·         Gifts will be delivered but a maximum of two pieces per household which must be within the size and weight limits as follows (dimensional measurements calculated by adding the length, width and height of an item):

o   1st piece - up to 22 dimensional inches and no more than 10 lbs.  There is a $5.00 reindeer-burden surcharge fee per each additional pound.

o   2nd piece - up to 22 dimensional inches and no more than 10 lbs.  There is a $5.00 reindeer-burden surcharge fee per each additional pound.

·         One Christmas stocking gift may be requested but only can be up to 12 dimensional inches and must fit comfortably under Santa's seat. Only one stocking gift item is allowed unless otherwise stated.”

Please share your thoughts about "things that make you go 'Hmmm' “:

What is good about dropping a ball (peach, pelican or other object) to signify the start of the new year?

Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is mystery. Today is a gift.  Remember to smile and enjoy.

Hal

Chinese tradition: Whatever you do on New Year’s Day you will be blessed or cursed with doing often during the year.  So do what you consider fun, get some exercise and don’t pay any bills on Sunday, Jan 1.  Alison and I will be sailing.  J