Somewhere in the world a woman gives birth to a child every minute. What should we do for her?

In response to last week’s question, "Somewhere in the world a woman gives birth to a child every minute. What should we do for her?,"  my comedic Weather Channel friend Bruce cautioned, "Keep her away from Minutemen."

My temple friend Richard suggested, "Give her a lifetime supply of Pampers, Enfamil, and a Sleep Number Bed (She’s going to need a LOT of naps!)," while another temple friend, Bob advised, "We need to get her some type of birth control. One a minute is too much for one  woman."

My friend Lesley queried, "giving birth to a baby every minute is quite the feat and I would be curious as to what male can keep up with that pace?"

My cousin Valarie proposed, "sending her to Italy, where the birth rate has dropped to its lowest in 150 years! Maybe that will help, and if it doesn't, then she has had a nice vacation in my favorite European country. I'll be there next month but I won't promise to check in on her."

And my dental friend Andrew shared that "as a work colleague had a baby over the weekend, what should we do? Laugh, cry, pray?  Here is an old joke: "When you enter the world, you are crying and everyone else is laughing. When you leave the world, everyone else is crying, so you should be laughing!" Also, "your birth day (the day you are born) is the only day you are allowed to make your mama cry." Pray for all new mothers--they are angelic. God couldn't be everywhere, so he invented mothers."

Please share your thoughts about this week's "things that make you go 'Hmmm' “:

Can you have baked fries?  from my recruiting friend Jason

We don't stop laughing because we get old. We get old because we stop laughing.  Make it a priority to have fun and make others laugh.

Hal

Thanks to Demetri Martin, Steven Wright and George Carlin for the inspiration for Hmmm.  Stop by www.nichelabs.com to see what else I'm up to.

What are your public parts?

In response to last week’s question, "What are your public parts?,"  my writing and sailing friend Rich suggested, "Those are the parts that you  are willing to show the world without tequila."

My marketing friend Mark replied, "It's all the parts we cannot lie about," to which my PR friend Stan added, "Anything about me on the Internet is a public part."

My dad's beach buddy Bob called-out "that it should include everything that is not classified as your private parts," to which my data recovery friend David added, "Public parts are the parts the IRS gets to play with and you feel violated afterward."

My cousin Wes admitted, "At my age and shape, hands and face. :)  "

And my sailing friend John pointed out, "Public parts would seem to be the opposite of 'private parts', and private parts are probably best defined as those parts that we don't want anyone to see.  I'd have to say that as a practicing naturist I don't really have any private parts, so then I guess all my parts are public parts.  But having said that, it kinda sounds like I have some desire to publicize my parts - which I don't!  So always keep in mind there is a distinct difference between a an exhibitionist (who WANTS everyone to see all his/her parts), and a naturist (who DOESN'T CARE who sees all his/her parts)."

Please share your thoughts about this week's "things that make you go 'Hmmm' “:

Somewhere in the world a woman gives birth to a child every minute. 

What should we do for her? 

Smile for no reason.  It's healthy.

Hal

Thanks to Demetri Martin, Steven Wright and George Carlin for the inspiration for Hmmm.  Stop by www.nichelabs.com to see what else I'm up to.

     

How big is superjumbo?

In response to last week’s question, "How big is superjumbo?,"  my writing and sailing friend Rich concluded, "It's less than you want and more than you need."  My jeweler friend Bill  called out, "It depends if you have fries with it or not" to which my marketing colleague Stan quantified, "8,000 calories – minimum."

My temple friend Richard replied, "Not sure how big, but I’m absolutely certain that steroids and other PEDs were involved!  By the way, the late, great George Carlin had a great riff on the phrase “jumbo shrimp” He could not decide whether that referred to a large shrimp or a small jumbo."

My dad, who continues to be an inspiring leader, noted that "Super jumbo is the size of the man sitting next to you on an airplane."

My birthday bud Jon observed, "Superjumbo?  Chris Christie, plus Trump’s ego."

My transportation friend Joe quietly commented, "I won’t say - I don’t like to brag,"

My Utah friend Bruce lamented, "I'm not sure of measurements like super jumbo - I can't even figure out Common Core academic standards."

My dad's beach buddy Bob declared, "In South Carolina we call it a 787.  We know because we make them here in Charleston and they are bigger than hell."  Then my neighbor and professional pilot Al and my cycling friend Ted concurred, "Superjumbo? Go google some pictures of the Airbus A380!"

Please share your thoughts about this week's "things that make you go 'Hmmm' “:

What are your public parts? from Demetri Martin

Smile for no reason.  It's healthy.

Hal

Congratulations to Rabbi Steve Lebow and Cobb County for an inspiring message about "the newer South."  It was the right message at the right time.  If you want to see his talk, click here, select "On Demand," select "Leo Frank 100th Anniversary" and Rabbi Lebow's message starts at 1:14:00.

Thanks to Demetri Martin, Steven Wright and George Carlin for the inspiration for Hmmm.  Stop by www.nichelabs.com to see what else I'm up to.

     

Is a mistake repeated more than once a decision?

In response to last week’s question, "Is a mistake repeated more than once a decision?," my equestrian friend Royce suggested, "Ask 'The Donald,'" to which my temple friend Richard added, "I believe the technical term for a mistake repeated more than once is called 'reelection.'   This reminds me that the word 'politics' comes from the Latin terms “poly”, which means “many”, and “tics”, which are blood-sucking vermin."

My sailing and Silicon Valley-gone-TX friend Ed declared, "No.  Its corporate policy."   My writing and sailing friend Rich seemed to concur, adding, "One mistake can happen to anyone, the same mistake twice means I have failed to properly address your training, the same mistake repeated a third time indicates I made a mistake when I hired you."

My cousin, Greg (actually cousin once removed) noted, "Legally, that's called 'insanity,'" to which my neighbor Al expounded, "Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. Albert Einstein"

My dad's beach buddy Bob replied, "Of course.  Idiots do it all the time."

My Utah friend Bruce recalled, "No ...it's just like Miss Applegate (your second grade teacher) told you, "it's okay, Hal, you're just a little slow...".   My cycling friend Ted provided a different view, "No. That just makes you a Blond!"

Please share your thoughts about this week's "things that make you go 'Hmmm' “:

How big is superjumbo?

Smile for no reason.  It's healthy.

Hal

Thanks to Demetri Martin, Steven Wright and George Carlin for the inspiration for Hmmm.  Stop by www.nichelabs.com to see what else I'm up to.