Who makes the best promises?

In response to last week’s imponderable question, “Who makes the best promises?,”  my physicist and disc golf friend Blake concluded, “Gravity. It will always let you down.”

My neighbor Al declared, “Conopco  A division of Unilever.” (You thought Promise spread and Promise Extra Light margarine were made by a family dairy?)

My temple friend Leslie recalled, “Yes, and he is still standing on first after all of these years.  (reference to Abbott and Castello that initially missed; kudos to Leslie)

My collaboration and running friend Andy  observed, ”I'm pretty sure Brown's fans would say Bud Light.” My adjunct executive friend Lindy continued, “Probably advertisers –Nestles (makes the very best…chocolate), Jewelers, etc. Who are we to disagree with all the Best Ever, New and Improved promises they share?:

My dad’s beach buddy Bob called out, “Mafia Dons.  You can bet your last shovel of dirt in your grave on it.  Santa comes in second.”

My birthday bud Jon knew simply, “Liars.”  To this, my cousin Greg opined, “Any politician in an election year,” to which my sailing friend Norm added, “Politicians as you did not ask who KEEPS the best promises!

My cycling friend Ted proffered, “Santa to a Jewish kid--I promise you will get no xmas present!’

And my business development friend Ray counseled, “Those who don't break them!”

Please send me your thoughts about this week's "things that make you go 'Hmmm' ":

How do you make a decision when you are in the dark?*

Lord, give me a sense of humor; give me the ability to understand a clean joke; to get some humor out of life, and to pass it on to other folks. 

Hal

*Fri, Dec 21 is the longest night of the year aka Winter Solstice.  Lots of dark.  In Nome, AL, the sun will rise at 12:02pm and set at 3:57pm (20 hr, 6min of night), which is 17 hours, 33 minutes longer than June’s Summer Solstice.  Always looking for the bright side, that means that on Saturday, the days start getting longer, and there is only 90 days until Spring.

Thanks to Demetri Martin, Steven Wright and George Carlin for the inspiration for Hmmm.   I invite you to call or email me to catch up.

If veggies like Romaine lettuce are better for you than chocolate, how come there haven’t been any recalls for chocolate?

In response to last week’s imponderable question, “If veggies like Romaine lettuce are better for you than chocolate, how come there haven’t been any recalls for chocolate?,”  my interfaith community friend Ann declared, “Because no sane person would throw away chocolate; they'd all gamble that theirs was ok,” to which my dad’s beach buddy Bob concluded, “Because there are never any leftovers.”  My cycling friend Ted, who is also a dentist, added, “If they were to recall chocolate, we would eat it anyway, deadly or not! So why bother?”  

My writing and sailing friend Rich challenged, “I reject the premise that veggies are better for you – One pound of romaine lettuce is 80 calories – One pound of chocolate is 2476 calories – The average man needs 2500 calories per day to maintain – One pound of chocolate or 31 plus pounds of romaine for the same caloric intake  -  There are no recalls on chocolate because chocolate is way more efficient than romaine and tastier too.”

My social media friend Mark shared, “I recall all chocolate almost immediately after I swallow. Too late to do any good, but I try! Every time.”

Please send me your thoughts about this week's "things that make you go 'Hmmm' ":

Who makes the best promises?

Lord, give me a sense of humor; give me the ability to understand a clean joke; to get some humor out of life, and to pass it on to other folks. 

Hal

If you know an individual or small business wanting to break the cycle of rising healthcare costs, please introduce me.  With so many people trying to figure out Open Enrollment and questioning these new ‘short term medical’ plans, I can share some solid advice.

Thanks to Demetri Martin, Steven Wright and George Carlin for the inspiration for Hmmm.   I invite you to call or email me to catch up.

With Thanksgiving a recent memory, are there left-unders or right-overs?

In response to last week’s imponderable question, “With Thanksgiving a recent memory, are there left-unders or right-overs?,” my writing and sailing friend Rich observed, “Right overs are when you take your leftover lean turkey breast and turn it into a healthy salad.  Left-unders are when you take the pie out of the fridge, a spoon out the drawer, get under the covers and don’t come out until there is no more pie or self-esteem.”

My cycling friend Ted explained, “The left unders are the pieces of turkey left under the table for the 4 legged vacuum, and the right overs is the cranberry sauce in the back of the fridge that your wife says ‘It’s right over on the 2nd shelf on the right; if it were a snake it would have bit you!’"

My production management friend Ray agreed, “For those dishes we don't like, those are left under the table (actually did this as a child as a way to avoid eating one of my aunt's awful brussel sprouts one Thanksgiving) and then there are others we pass right over, usually to the person sitting to our right or left at the dining room table.”

My adjunct executive friend Lindy replied, “I’m sure dogs hope for left-unders, which is why they camp under the table. Right-overs would be dishes (in my case a pie) that didn’t turn out right and we have more holidays coming to try again.

Please send me your thoughts about this week's "things that make you go 'Hmmm' ":

If veggies like Romaine lettuce are better for you than chocolate, how come there haven’t been any recalls for chocolate?

Lord, give me a sense of humor; give me the ability to understand a clean joke; to get some humor out of life, and to pass it on to other folks. 

Hal

If you know an individual or small business wanting to break the cycle of rising healthcare costs, please introduce me.  With so many people trying to figure out Open Enrollment and questioning these new ‘short term medical’ plans, I can share some solid advice.

Thanks to Demetri Martin, Steven Wright and George Carlin for the inspiration for Hmmm.   I invite you to call or email me to catch up.

What are you thankful for about people who are different than you?

In response to last week’s imponderable question, “What are you thankful for about people who are different than you?,” my writing and sailing friend Rich pointed out, “Because it does in fact take a village and that includes the village idiot to blaze the ‘don’t go that way path.’ To the rest of the village I can only say ‘you’re welcome’.”

My wife Alison replied, “Thankful for their sharing!” to which my equestrian friend Royce added, “Diversity makes us all better persons.”  My college roomie John then explained, “Differences introduce us to new experiences, adds diversity, yet we still find out that in many ways we are the same and we do have many things to be grateful for.”

My production manager friend Ray pontificated, “Each person is unique, thus different from anyone else. And yet, each person being unique means that we all are the same, that is, we are all unique. It is being samely unique that allows us to be individuals, but at the same time to be a family known as mankind. And for that I am truly thankful. As we said so many centuries ago, the first moment of dawn is when you can look into the eyes of another human being and see yourself.   As to the glass being half-full or half-empty, I don't look at it either way. I just know that it's refillable.  Namaste my friend and what a unique person you are.”

My dad’s beach buddy Bob explained, “Much depends on where the differences are.  Appearance makes it challenging and interesting.  Philosophically and politically depends on the perceived solution to life's problems.”

One of our Ecumenical Thanksgiving speakers Tom shared, “My grandfather told me, ‘If everyone was the same, they’d all be in love with your grandmother.’”

My sailing friend Glenn lamented, “Missed this one.  From the discussion on bingeing, I blacked out again.”

Please send me your thoughts about this week's "things that make you go 'Hmmm' ":

With Thanksgiving a recent memory, are there left-unders or right-overs?

Lord, give me a sense of humor; give me the ability to understand a clean joke; to get some humor out of life, and to pass it on to other folks. 

Hal

My insightful friend Dr. Dwana shared a reply to “who pays?’, “NOT the one who starts their order with ‘We’ll have separate checks!’” 

Thanks to Demetri Martin, Steven Wright and George Carlin for the inspiration for Hmmm.   I invite you to call or email me to catch up.

Can you be over-saturated?

In response to last week’s imponderable question, “Can you be over-saturated?,” my birthday bud Jon concluded, “That would be a very unique situation,” while my cousin Valarie explained, “Being over-saturated is as feasible as giving 110 percent--impossible but quite common in our exaggerated vernacular.”

My writing and sailing friend Rich shared, “Tequila tends to over saturate my filters,” to which my social media friend Mark admitted, “It’s been a while, but I remember drinking much more than humanly possible in college...more than a few times.”

My college roomie John requested, “At the risk of being political, I believe we are over-saturated with coverage of the orange clown in DC.   Can the media please boycott him and just cover other news worthy items?”

My cycling friend Ted, who is also a private pilot, advised, “Reading lots of NTSB reports on how people die in airplanes, task over saturation can be quite lethal in a cockpit. Just don't bother your pilot when s/he's really busy- you will over saturate him/her.”

And my equestrian friend Royce pointed out, “Shouldn't that be ‘overly’ saturated?”

Please send me your thoughts about this week's "things that make you go 'Hmmm' ":

What are you thankful for about people who are different than you?

Lord, give me a sense of humor; give me the ability to understand a clean joke; to get some humor out of life, and to pass it on to other folks. 

Hal

Wishing you, your family, friend, and friends you haven’t met, a memorable holiday break.  We have more than enough to be thankful for.  If you can realize that ‘your cup is more than half full,’ then you realize we have much to be grateful for.  Yes, there is plenty to do to improve our world; the good news is that when we work together, like building a Habitat for Humanity home, clean-up a river, or help kids read, we all benefit.

Thanks to Demetri Martin, Steven Wright and George Carlin for the inspiration for Hmmm.   I invite you to call or email me to catch up.

Who pays the check?

In response to last week’s imponderable question, “Who pays the check?,” my dad’s beach buddy Bob called out, “Last person left sitting at the table” while my social media friend Mark felt, “The best person at the table. At least you should thank her accordingly.” 

My writing and sailing friend Rich observed, “Someone, always, it is an immutable law of physics, ‘There is no such thing as a free lunch.’  Any time you hear a proposal , your first question needs to be who or what is picking up the check……….”

My musical friend Jonathan wrote, “I think we all pay the check.  If there is something due, then everyone has to put something in to get something out. Some will pay with legal tender, others will pay with promises, some will pay with goodwill. Those who don’t pay don’t understand the value proposition if any balance due from anyone for anything. Dig? 😉“ to which my business development friend Ray agreed, “We all pay the check! There is no such thing as a free lunch!”

My equestrian friend Royce explained, “according to who has the expense account and/or needs a tax deduction for ‘business purposes’."

My collaboration and sailing friend Andy pointed out, “When the government spends, we all pay the check, but sometimes it’s worth it. Use your annual opportunity to give a bit of democratic feedback in the voting booth” to which my sailing friend Nom expounded, “If you're a Democrat, the government pays the check.  If you're a Republican, you pay the check. If you are real, you know our children will end up paying the check.”

Please send me your thoughts about this week's "things that make you go 'Hmmm' ":

Can you be over-saturated?

Life Love truly, Laugh uncontrollably And never regret anything that made you smile!

Hal

From last week’s “what is a pump kin to?”,  my temple friend Lesley noted, “the pump is a descendant of the bellows” and my equestrian friend Royce observed, “gas, which can be caused by a ‘pumpkin’ and or a necessary item for transportation.”

My Earthlink friend Bill shared, “I totally agree with Ray’s comments regarding the tragic events in Pittsburgh, and voted this past week to hopefully change the situation in our country.”  My college roomie John added, “I hope that we start a movement to a better place.  Our (American) history has been full of violence.  Let's hope we can do a better job for our children.  My concern is that the Greatest Generation did their part, but our generation has not done our part.  We still have time.”

As proof of this positive motion, I’m helping plan the 14th annual Thanksgiving Ecumenical Celebration this Thu, Nov 15 at 7p.  Click here for details because this is an annual display of respectful conversation and reflection.  Join us in person (carpool and arrive early) or watch streaming live online.

Thanks to Demetri Martin, Steven Wright and George Carlin for the inspiration for Hmmm.   I invite you to call or email me to catch up.

What is a pump kin to?

In response to last week’s imponderable question, “What is a pump kin to?,” my business development friend Ray replied, “if you're at the local coffee café, a pump is kin to another shot.”  And my sister-in-law Lorrie noted, “Looking though my shoe bags, I see my pumps have a lot of kin in sneakers, flats, and slippers - some of which haven't seen the light of day much less proximity to the ground in a long while.

One could add that a pump device is a kin to gravity; what gravity does to fluids and slurry, pumps can do, and do so uphill.  In baseball, a pump is a kin to a balk; and in law enforcement, a pump is a kin to prodding for information.  And with an ego, it is a kin to making someone feel good, even if not earned. 

On a serious note, thank you for the outpouring of feelings and sympathy regarding the Oct 27 killings in a synagogue in Pittsburg.  I personally received numerous phone calls and emails expressing extreme sadness for our community as a whole as well as the Tree of Life congregation, and support to end hate-motivated violence.  As my friend Ray wrote,

It is impossible to put into words the level of chagrin that this household has over all of this. Really hard to put into words that would be deemed printable. If there was ever a place where we as a society could find refuge, solemnity and safety in times of crisis, it was our religious institutions (churches in Charleston, SC and Sutherland Springs, Texas are other examples). Such is no longer the case. We have drifted so badly that the notion of having reasonable – let alone civil – discourse is out the window. Everyone is so quick to say "God Bless America" yet we can only hope and pray that The Almighty does bless us during these difficult times. You, I, and others grew up in a multiplicity of ethnic backgrounds and we were taught to respect others and to learn from cultures and traditions different from ours. We also did it with a keen sense of humor that is steadily diminishing in our society. At the same time, when someone got out of line, we let them know about it while remaining civil. 

May we find ways to remain civil and respectful as we push for solutions.  And may we find and care for those that seem despondent, overwhelmed, and alone, so that they do not turn to the darkest corners of the Internet for find support of other loners who turn to illogical, inappropriate, and inhumane solutions.

Please send me your thoughts about this week's "things that make you go 'Hmmm' ":

Who pays the check? (from my friend Lon)

Life is too short for drama and petty things, so kiss slowly, laugh insanely, love truly, and forgive quickly.

Hal

If you haven’t voted early, please vote on Tuesday.  All votes count.  It’s a system that’s served our country for 240+ years.

For my part of respectful conversation, save the date:  I’m helping plan the 14th annual Thanksgiving Ecumenical Celebration on Thu, Nov 15 at 7p.  Click here for details because this is an annual display of respectful conversation and reflection.  Join us in person or what streaming live online.

Thanks to Demetri Martin, Steven Wright and George Carlin for the inspiration for Hmmm.   I invite you to call or email me to catch up.

In response to last week’s imponderable question, “What is a pump kin to?,” my business development friend Ray replied, “if you're at the local coffee café, a pump is kin to another shot.”  And my sister-in-law Lorrie noted, “Looking though my shoe bags, I see my pumps have a lot of kin in sneakers, flats, and slippers - some of which haven't seen the light of day much less proximity to the ground in a long while.

One could add that a pump device is a kin to gravity; what gravity does to fluids and slurry, pumps can do, and do so uphill.  In baseball, a pump is a kin to a balk; and in law enforcement, a pump is a kin to prodding for information.  And with an ego, it is a kin to making someone feel good, even if not earned. 

On a serious note, thank you for the outpouring of feelings and sympathy regarding the Oct 27 killings in a synagogue in Pittsburg.  I personally received numerous phone calls and emails expressing extreme sadness for our community as a whole as well as the Tree of Life congregation, and support to end hate-motivated violence.  As my friend Ray wrote,

It is impossible to put into words the level of chagrin that this household has over all of this. Really hard to put into words that would be deemed printable. If there was ever a place where we as a society could find refuge, solemnity and safety in times of crisis, it was our religious institutions (churches in Charleston, SC and Sutherland Springs, Texas are other examples). Such is no longer the case. We have drifted so badly that the notion of having reasonable – let alone civil – discourse is out the window. Everyone is so quick to say "God Bless America" yet we can only hope and pray that The Almighty does bless us during these difficult times. You, I, and others grew up in a multiplicity of ethnic backgrounds and we were taught to respect others and to learn from cultures and traditions different from ours. We also did it with a keen sense of humor that is steadily diminishing in our society. At the same time, when someone got out of line, we let them know about it while remaining civil. 

May we find ways to remain civil and respectful as we push for solutions.  And may we find and care for those that seem despondent, overwhelmed, and alone, so that they do not turn to the darkest corners of the Internet for find support of other loners who turn to illogical, inappropriate, and inhumane solutions.

Please send me your thoughts about this week's "things that make you go 'Hmmm' ":

Who pays the check? (from my friend Lon)

Life is too short for drama and petty things, so kiss slowly, laugh insanely, love truly, and forgive quickly.

Hal

If you haven’t voted early, please vote on Tuesday.  All votes count.  It’s a system that’s served our country for 240+ years.

For my part of respectful conversation, save the date:  I’m helping plan the 14th annual Thanksgiving Ecumenical Celebration on Thu, Nov 15 at 7p.  Click here for details because this is an annual display of respectful conversation and reflection.  Join us in person or what streaming live online.

Thanks to Demetri Martin, Steven Wright and George Carlin for the inspiration for Hmmm.   I invite you to call or email me to catch up.

Does a colon slow you down?

In response to last week’s imponderable question, “Does a colon slow you down?,” my birthday bud Jon observed, “No, but a colonoscopy does” while my sailing friend Norm countered, “A colon does not slow me down.  A colonoscopy speeds me up.”    

My temple friend Lesley recalled, “Absolutely, especially when running a race and pit-stops are unfortunately needed!”

When my equestrian friend Royce pondered, “It's according to if it's a colon or a semi-colon,” from temple friend Richard explained, “It depends upon whether you are referring to a colon as punctuation or part of the anatomy. In punctuation, a colon precedes a list, so reading the list will slow you down, whereas a semicolon is simply a break within a sentence to separate two ideas.  In anatomy, a whole colon would be considered a good thing, but a semicolon is probably not such a good thing.”

My production management friend Ray warned, “Only if it ruptures.”  Yet my cycling friend Ted observed, “Quite the contrary!! When it's misbehaving it can quite speed you up!”

My sister-in-law Lorrie replied, “I'm thinking that life without a colon would be particularly slow.”   And my dad’s beach buddy Bob concluded, “No, but it can store a lot of material before disposal.”

My cousin Greg called out, “Grammatically speaking it keeps you going.”

Please send me your thoughts about this week's "things that make you go 'Hmmm' ":

What is a pump kin to?

Life is too short for drama and petty things, so kiss slowly, laugh insanely, love truly, and forgive quickly.

Hal

Thank you to the people of many different faiths who wrote yesterday to condemn the hate-motivated violence against a Jewish synagogue in Pittsburgh.  When do we say ‘enough is enough,’ put aside political differences and have a respectful conversation about bigotry, xenophobia, hate of other religions, races, ethnicity, sexual orientation?  To quote our rabbi, “We see ourselves as Christians, Hindus, Jews, Muslims, and other religions; G-d sees us all as G-d’s children.”  What does it take to have the conversation (and no, this is not a “Hmmm”)?   Please strengthen (y)our resolve to talk respectfully with others so that we can prevent these tragedies, which may in part be mental health related.

For my part of respectful conversation, save the date:  I’m helping plan the 14th annual Thanksgiving Ecumenical Celebration on Thu, Nov 15 at 7p.  Click here for details because this is an annual display of respectful conversation and reflection.

Thanks to Demetri Martin, Steven Wright and George Carlin for the inspiration for Hmmm.   I invite you to call or email me to catch up.

What is old?

In response to last week’s imponderable question, “What is old?,” my engineering friend Steve wrote precisely, “It’s all relative!” to which my business development friend Ray added, “What we in the U.S. consider old would be ‘new’ in other parts of the world. People 65 years old were considered old. Such is not the case today.”

My telecom friend Gus shared, “Old can be classic, time-honored, experienced, seasoned, enduring, ageless, long lasting. On the other hand, old can be ancient, antiquated, archaic, dated, decrepit, fossilized, kaput. It all depends on your perspective, state of mind and / or state of health.   In my case I’m not getting old, I’m getting better (and apparently more arrogant).”

My cycling friend Ted replied, “The oldest thing in the universe is the Universe, but according to my kids, it's me,” to which my equestrian friend Royce countered, “G-d.”

And my dad’s beach buddy Bob lamented, “Old is everything that happened through yesterday...most of which is worth forgetting.”

Please send me your thoughts about this week's "things that make you go 'Hmmm' ":

Does a colon slow you down?

Life is too short for drama and petty things, so kiss slowly, laugh insanely, love truly, and forgive quickly.

Hal

There were 2 replies to the prior week’s question.  My health coaching friend Beth noted that the “definition of bingeing is an act of excessive or compulsive consumption (as of food); went on an eating binge; binge drinking.  It’s pretty common.  As a Health Coach, I see it more often than others,” to which my sailing friend Glenn replied,”I guess I missed this one because I was blacked out.”

This Wed is World Polio Day and a day to be proud to be a Rotarian.  Only 19 cases of WPV have been documented throughout the world in 2018; these were in Pakistan and Afghanistan.

Thanks to Demetri Martin, Steven Wright and George Carlin for the inspiration for Hmmm.   I invite you to call or email me to catch up.

When is it considered bingeing?

In response to last week’s imponderable question, “When is it considered bingeing?,” my social media friend Mark pointed out, “When you are too embarrassed to tell your friends about it. Or worse, you do it when your spouse is out or asleep.”

My cousin Wes  acknowledged, “As a lone ranger, eating a package of Voortman sugar cookies during  a 3 hours drive. HiHo Sugar away!”

My sister-in-law Lorrie explained, “When you totally overdo it but it felt oh, so good….until the next day.”

My neighbor Al concluded, “If it involves a funnel and a hose, or wearing a diaper,” after which my equestrian friend Royce replied, “I hate to sound redundant, but is this a Kavanaugh question?”

My dad’s beach buddy Bob lamented, “It is a prolonged period—hours to days—in which an addict ingests increased amounts of cocaine, crack, alcohol or another abuse substance, often without rest,  I am too old for it.

And my business development friend Ray responded, “When consumption of anything – material or otherwise – is in such excess that your world resembles a blowfish in distress!”

Please send me your thoughts about this week's "things that make you go 'Hmmm' ":

What is old? [from my colleague Tricia)

Life is too short for drama and petty things, so kiss slowly, laugh insanely, love truly, and forgive quickly.

Hal

Save the date:  I’m helping plan the 14th annual Thanksgiving Ecumenical Celebration on Thu, Nov 15 at 7p.  Click here for details.

Do you know a small business in ATL that is paying too much for healthcare (or can’t afford to offer healthcare benefits)?  As part of a solution that was covered in Atlanta Business Journal and Coastal Seasons (cover story starts on pg 24), I would appreciate an introduction to that business.

Thanks to Demetri Martin, Steven Wright and George Carlin for the inspiration for Hmmm.   I invite you to call or email me to catch up.

The future is already here. Is it evenly distributed?

In response to last week’s imponderable question, “The future is already here. Is it evenly distributed?,” my social media friend Mark replied, “I missed it. I’ll have to catch “the future” next time. Maybe tomorrow.”

My equestrian friend Royce asked, “Is this a "Bitcoin" question?”

My temple friend Richard called out, “Like most things, the future is distributed in a “normal” distribution (i.e., the famous bell-shaped curve).  In other words, for a small percentage of us, the future will be very bright indeed. For an equally small percentage, the future will prove to be very dismal.  For the rest of us, it’ll be OK… some good, some bad.  When contemplating the future, it is best to keep in mind every day that “today is the tomorrow that we dreaded yesterday.”

My dad’s beach buddy Bob lamented, “I personally do not like the way the pie is cut and distributed forst to my enemies.”

And my college roomie John suggested, “No, Hal gets all the fun!”

Please send me your thoughts about this week's "things that make you go 'Hmmm' ":

When is it considered bingeing? [from my friend Blake]

Life is too short for drama and petty things, so kiss slowly, laugh insanely, love truly, and forgive quickly.

Hal

Save the date:  I’m helping plan the 14th annual Thanksgiving Ecumenical Celebration on Thu, Nov 15 at 7p.  Click here for details.

Do you know a small business in ATL that is paying too much for healthcare (or can’t afford to offer healthcare benefits)?  As part of a solution that was covered in Atlanta Business Journal and Coastal Seasons (cover story starts on pg 24), I would appreciate an introduction to that business.

Thanks to Demetri Martin, Steven Wright and George Carlin for the inspiration for Hmmm.   I invite you to call or email me to catch up.

Why can’t women put on mascara with their mouth closed?

In response to last week’s imponderable question, “Why can’t women put on mascara with their mouth closed?,” my ethics-in-business friend Blair retorted, “Only a man would ask that question,” to which my equestrian friend Royce replied, “That is a question only a woman can answer.”   My business development friend Ray wondered, “Not sure I even want to go there!” to which my temple friend Richard declaored, “I think the best advice I can offer on this week’s imponderable is ‘Back away slowly and no one will get hurt.’”

Now that we have that established, my realtor friend Lara challenged, “Are you implying that men CAN put mascara on with their mouths closed? :) ”

My interfaith community friend and RN Ann explained, “There's a tiny, little-known muscle that connects the eyes to the mouth.  The wider she opens her eyes, the wider her mouth opens.  It works just the opposite in men.  The more their eyes close, the more their mouths open, especially while driving, sitting in church or listening to their wives.”  My dad’s beach buddy Bob suggested, “to catch the drippings.”

My social media friend Mark daringly responded, “I’d like to know what they would do with their mouth closed.”

Please send me your thoughts about this week's "things that make you go 'Hmmm' ":

The future is already here. Is it evenly distributed" [paraphrasing William Gibson]

Life is too short for drama and petty things, so kiss slowly, laugh insanely, love truly, and forgive quickly.

Hal

Do you know a small business in ATL that is paying too much for healthcare (or can’t afford to offer healthcare benefits)?  As part of a solution that was covered in Atlanta Business Journal and Coastal Seasons (cover story starts on pg 24), I would appreciate an introduction to that business.

Thanks to Demetri Martin, Steven Wright and George Carlin for the inspiration for Hmmm.   I invite you to call or email me to catch up.

What is a good pirate?

In response to last week’s imponderable question, “What is a good pirate?,” my sailing and legal ethics friend Mike declared, “One who doesn’t ARGH-ue with you.”

My dad’s beach buddy Bob concluded, “One who survives.  That is why we left Charleston and went to Marco Island to escape hurricane Florence and enjoyed part of the loot we saved for the last 50 years.”

My birthday bud Jon announced, “Roberto Clemente,” to which my temple friend Kevin expounded, “Certainly Roberto Clemente, Willie Stargell and the ever-smiling Manny Sanguillen.”   And another temple friend, Richard explained, “When I was growing up in Pennsylvania, Roberto Clemente and Willie Stargell were great (Pittsburgh) Pirates. Since I have lived in Georgia for 27 years, now I would say it’s any Pirate who signs a contract with the Atlanta Braves.”

And my college roomie John replied, “Any pirate on Hal's boat!”

Please send me your thoughts about this week's "things that make you go 'Hmmm' ":

Why can’t women put on mascara with their mouth closed?

The happiest people don't have the best of everything. They just make the best of everything.

Hal

Healthcare question:  Do you know a small business in ATL that is paying too much for healthcare.  As part of a solution that was covered in Atlanta Business Journal and Coastal Seasons (cover story starts on pg 24), I would appreciate an introduction.

Thanks to Demetri Martin, Steven Wright and George Carlin for the inspiration for Hmmm.   I invite you to call or email me to catch up.

What happens when poison expires?

In response to last week’s imponderable question, “What happens when poison expires?,” my social media friend Mark concluded, “Another stupid 80’s band drops the mic for good.” 

My birthday bud Jon observed, “The person who takes it doesn’t.”

Yet my sailing from Norm replied, “when the insect, animal or person that ingested it expires” and my equestrian friend Royce agreed, “you are usually dead.”

My engineering friend Steve noted, “I think only governments with the death penalty seem to care… go figure.” My dad’s beach buddy Bob replied, “It becomes silently lethal.”

My cycling friend Ted declared, “It becomes Health Food!” while my Utah friend Bruce called out, “It is saved as your mother-in-law’s home-made gravy or sauce😳  “

My sailing friend Kurt replied, “Instead of killing pests on contact, it provides a slower passing.”

Please send me your thoughts about this week's "things that make you go 'Hmmm' ":

If all is not lost, where is it?

The happiest people don't have the best of everything. They just make the best of everything.

Hal

        

Wishing my Jewish family and friends L’shona tova (Happy New Year).  May you be inscribed in the Book of Life for another good year.

Thanks to Demetri Martin, Steven Wright and George Carlin for the inspiration for Hmmm.   I invite you to call or email me to catch up.

When does sandal season end?

In response to last week’s imponderable question, “When does sandal season end?,” my sailing friend Kurt queried, “It ends? Is this like wearing white after Labor Day?”

My writing and sailing friend Rich explained, “All depends on your latitude and attitude,” to which my cousin Valarie added, “When hell freezes over.  Some places never get cold enough to shelve that strappy footwear, and if you're someplace too cold for sandals, you need to change location, not shoes.

My neighbor Al recalled, “When I lived in Buffalo it was mid-July,” to which my adjunct executive friend Lindy concluded, “It depends on where you live.  In the islands it lasts for eternity.  In the north, it lasts for 20 minutes.  Inside your home it can last as long as you like if you turn up the heat.”  My temple friend Tracey explained, “In Atlanta, virtually never. It can be 75* on Christmas Day. Keep them handy 24/7/365.”

My dad’s beach buddy Bob observed, “For some, never....they even wear them in the snow.”  My business development friend Ray noted, “If we lived in Biblical times, sandal season never ended. In the modern era, I believe the same applies if your feet can withstand the inclement weather attendant with the winter season! Just head to the tropics for eternal sandal season!”

My birthday bud Jon remarked, “When socks become necessary,” to which my engineering friend Steve expounded, “With good wool socks and my Chaco’s it never does” and my equestrian friend Royce concurred, “Birkenstocks know no season.”  My PR friend Stan added, “For some people, sandal season ends when it’s too cold to go barefoot – at least if you have sandals that have toe loops. If you don’t have toe loops or have socks with a split for your big toes (mittens for feet) and are OK with wearing socks and sandals, the season never ends.”

My sailing friend Norm  and my hiking friend Kelly declared, “In paradise - NEVER!! ⛵😎!”

And my temple friend Richard lamented, “I sunburn too easily to know the answer to that question.  For me, sandal season never starts….ever.”

Please send me your thoughts about this week's "things that make you go 'Hmmm' ":

What happens when poison expires?

The happiest people don't have the best of everything. They just make the best of everything.

Hal

        

Congratulations to the many, many volunteers and volunteer leaders that made Looking for a Noshfest a success this past weekend.  It’s great to see such an engaged community, both external and internal.

Thanks to Demetri Martin, Steven Wright and George Carlin for the inspiration for Hmmm.   I invite you to call or email me to catch up.

Should there be veggie meatloaf?

In response to last week’s imponderable question, “Should there be veggie meatloaf?,” my sister-in-law Lorrie concluded, “Sure, that is a mother's dream - mix your veggies with meat and make a loaf.  Now the kids can't separate out the veggies they don't like!”

However, my temple friend Leslie advised, “Edible oxymorons should not be allowed,” to which my temple friend Tracey declared, “Not just no... HELL no!!”  My neighbor Al agreed, “Only in hell.”

My cousin Greg suggested, “Only if Meatloaf becomes a vegetarian.”  (click here for update on his back surgery)

My dad’s beach buddy Bob replied, “Why not.  Will go well with South Beach Mashed Potatoes made with cauliflower. 

When my biz dev friend Ray wrote, “Why not? We have veggie burgers!”, my cousin Dave cautioned, “Yes.  There should be veggie meatloaf and vegan lasagna but they don't taste as good as the real thing,” to which my social media friend Mark note, “Sure, but I just call it a casserole.”

My interfaith friend Ann continued, “Yes, but it shouldn't be called meatloaf to avoid antagonizing the rabid carnivores.  Call it soy-loaf or veg-a-loaf or tof-loaf.  Ummm,” to which my sailing friend Norm agreed, “No such thing. That would be a ‘Veggieloaf’, not a ‘meatloaf ’ ".  

And my managed IT friend Kosol asked, “Please No, then it would be called Veggie loaf.  Doesn’t sound appealing at all.   Back to real food...Why are boneless wings not even wings at all? 

Please send me your thoughts about this week's "things that make you go 'Hmmm' ":

When does sandal season end?

The happiest people don't have the best of everything. They just make the best of everything.

Hal

        

Looking for a fun food festival this Sunday/Monday?  Noshfest returns to E Cobb as a community event.

Thanks to Demetri Martin, Steven Wright and George Carlin for the inspiration for Hmmm.   I invite you to call or email me to catch up.

When are lefties right?

In response to last week’s imponderable question, “When are lefties right?,” my cousin Dave, and sailing friends Norm and Tom called out, “the brain is ‘cross-wired.’  Since the opposite side of your brain controls your muscles, lefties are always in their right mind. :)

My engineering friend Steve said, “Whenever they get their facts straight,” which my equestrian friend Royce agreed, “If they answer all of the questions correctly.”

My business development friend Ray replied, “Whenever the port siders (lefties) throw a strike!” to which my birthday bud Jon added, “Usually when the manager is deciding who to have pitch against another lefty.  Although that doesn’t seem to help in the Nats bullpen.”

And my social media friend Mark responded, “Math suggests they are right 13% of the time.”

Please send me your thoughts about this week's "things that make you go 'Hmmm' ":

      Should there be veggie meatloaf? from my senior community friend John B

Life is short! Break the rules! Forgive quickly! Kiss slowly!

Hal

        

Thanks to Demetri Martin, Steven Wright and George Carlin for the inspiration for Hmmm.   I invite you to call or email me to catch up.

Can you be outstanding indoors?

In response to last week’s imponderable question, “Can you be outstanding indoors?,” my temple friend Tracey observed, “Absolutely! It depends on where your talents lie.” 

My writing and sailing friend Rich replied, “Yes, yes you can,” to which my social media friend Mark explained, “In several ways;

- you can be an outstanding door salesperson

- you can be an outstanding person, but only inside

-  you can be an outed gay proudly standing in all doorways

My dad’s beach buddy Bob recalled, “Certainly.  The best meals are cooked indoors....many in my kitchen.....Jumbo shrimp stuffed with crabmeat ....a side of rice Florentine.  Desert will be raspberry ice cream with chocolate chinks.”

And my temple friend Henry called out, “A great example of how to be outstanding indoors is Hal and his team during the Ecumenical Thanksgiving Celebration the Thursday before Thanksgiving  (click here for details).”  Note:  The same can be said for Henry and team as they finish another Habitat for Humanity build.

Please send me your thoughts about this week's "things that make you go 'Hmmm' ":

When are lefties right?

For the ‘right 13% of the population,’ Aug 13 is Left Handers Day

Lord, give me a sense of humor; give me the ability to understand a clean joke; to get some humor out of life, and to pass it on to other folks. 

Hal

        

Thanks to Demetri Martin, Steven Wright and George Carlin for the inspiration for Hmmm.   I invite you to call or email me to catch up.

How do you tell that clean clothes have become dirty?

In response to last week’s imponderable question, “How do you tell that clean clothes have become dirty?,” my writing and sailing friend Rich advised, “Stand down wind.” Another sailing friend, Norm, agreed, “This is an easy question to answer.  When they smell really bad!! (and not before).”  And my business development friend Ray added,” When they stink so badly they scream ‘Wash Me!’"

To all of this, my adjunct executive friend Lindy replied, “You've worn them. You're such a guy. 😉 “

My social media friend Mark called out, “If the dog is sleeping on them, they are stinky and recommended for a washing opportunity. If the cat is sleeping on the pile, they are still fresh and ready to wear. Or at least were before the cat shed all over them.”

My realtor friend Lara shared, “How many notches are on the belt should give a pretty good indication on how dirty the clothes are. 

In my teenage daughter’s room, if they are wadded up in a pile on the chair or sofa they are clean. If they are wadded up in a heap on the floor they are dirty…or maybe clean.”

Please send me your thoughts about this week's "things that make you go 'Hmmm' ":

Can you be outstanding indoors?

Lord, give me a sense of humor; give me the ability to understand a clean joke; to get some humor out of life, and to pass it on to other folks. 

Hal

        

My attorney friend Phil replied to the prior week’s “Is ‘holler at’ good or bad?,”  with “Good if it's your friend, not so good if it's your mom.”

      

Thanks to Demetri Martin, Steven Wright and George Carlin for the inspiration for Hmmm.   I invite you to call or email me to catch up.

Is “holler at” good or bad?,

In response to last week’s imponderable question, “Is “holler at” good or bad?,”  my collaboration friend Tricia concluded, “As a southern girl, ‘holler at’ can be either good or bad...  If I say to you, I'll holler at ya when I can do lunch at the Skillet = that's good!   If I say the kids, don't do that or I'll have to holler at ya = that's bad,” to which my interfaith friend Ann expounded, “Depends on where you're from.  If you're from the north, being hollered at means you're in trouble.  If you're from the south, it means, ‘Hey, how you doin'?’"

My social media friend Mark called out, “Holler is bad. ‘Holla’ is good. ‘At’ is always bad.”

My temple friend Tracey understands, “If yer mama hollers at ya, it’s prolly not good. If yer friend hollers at ya, yer prolly gonna go out later.”  Another temple friend Richard added, “’Holler at’ means that someone is yelling at someone else, typically in a negative manner.  ‘Holler to’ means that someone is calling out to get the attention of someone else, possibly to pass information along to that person.  “Hoot’n Holler’ means Snuffy Smith lives nearby.”

My sailing friend Norm explained, “Here is the South, holler means  a small, sheltered valley: An "-er" sound is often used for long "o" at the end of a word. For example, hollow— "a small, sheltered valley"— is pronounced /ˈhɑlər/, homophonous with holler, to which my equestrian friend Royce noted, “It's according to which ‘holler at’ in the mountains, or who you want to ‘holler at’".

My production management friend Ray shared, “In the scope of my travels, and based upon my comprehensive interviews of highly educated scholars and others, I believe the "good or bad" question can summarily be answered by the few insightful words of prose that follow.

Few times I've been around that track / So it's not just gonna happen like that 

'Cause I ain't no hollaback guy  / I ain't no hollaback guy

That's BananaS / So put your pom-poms down clown

'Cause there ain't no circus comin' to town. / And another one bites the dust.

Please send me your thoughts about this week's "things that make you go 'Hmmm' ":

How do you tell that clean clothes have become dirty?

Lord, give me a sense of humor; give me the ability to understand a clean joke; to get some humor out of life, and to pass it on to other folks. 

Hal

              

You can tell we’re no longer an agricultural society when schools start on Aug 1…

Thanks to Demetri Martin, Steven Wright and George Carlin for the inspiration for Hmmm.   I invite you to call or email me to catch up.

What is the difference between a ‘fat chance’ and a ‘slim chance’?

In response to last week’s imponderable question, “What is the difference between a ‘fat chance’ and a ‘slim chance’?,” my temple friend Richard calculated “about 1200 calories/day” while another temple friend Lesley thought it was,”a few thousand calories!”  My real estate friend Lara replied, “The smart-ass answer is of course, “About 50 pounds!". Or, taken in relation to last week’s question, “A daily dose of DQ Double-dipped.”

My flower shop friend Bruce then concluded, “It’s your ability to religiously stick to that new exercise and diet regimen for six months.”

Cousin Wes observed “Fat chance is micro-aggression against obese people, where as slim chance is less so. Other than that nothing. It is like your Mom saying ‘Maybe’, which meant ‘No’.”  My birthday bud Jon added, “Same as the difference between ‘I could care less’ and ‘I couldn’t care less’.”

My sales friend Gus called out, “A slim chance is the ‘politically correct’ way of saying a fat chance. Don’t want anybody shaming when it comes to chance,” to which my social media friend Mark added, “For some odd reason, I’m afraid I’ll offend someone by answering a slim/fat ponderable. Ahhh, political correctness gone wild.”

My PR friend Stan determined that it is “the degree of sarcasm elevation” to which my sailing friend Norm expounded, “Fat chance and slim chance are used to mean the same thing. The difference is 'slim chance' is used literally. The speaker means you have little or no chance of success. 'Fat chance' is slang and it's sarcastic. The speaker doesn't mean you have a big chance, he means you have little chance! Also 'fat chance is most often used as a separate sentence to remark on what was just said. 'You think she'll lend you her car? Fat chance!'”  And the interjection 'big deal!' is used in a similar way to refer to something that is unimportant or unimpressive (= not big).”

My secretive friend Rutherford challenged the sarcasm observation with, "Fat chance" is ironic.”

My business coaching friend Stuart artfully wrote, “perCHANCE it is the CHANCEllor of waist inCH ANCEstry.”

My equestrian friend Royce suggested, “Donald Trump and Barack Obama, respectively.”

My comedic friend Bruce quipped, “I want that DQ chocolate cone. Slim chance that I'll say no to eating it and there's a fat chance that I won't gain weight.”  My temple friend Viv followed with, “another response to last week’s ice cream question and to this week's question -- July 15th was National Ice Cream Day, and it was no chance--fat or slim--to miss celebrating with a hot fudge sundae.   We absolutely need to celebrate National Holidays.”

My cousin Valarie remarked, “It’s counterintuitive.  A fat chance means no chance at all, while a slim chance offers some chance, albeit slim.”  And my sales friend Ray declared, “No chance!”

Please send me your thoughts about this week's "things that make you go 'Hmmm' ":

Is “holler at” good or bad? (with my colleague Kelly)

Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well-preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, wine in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO HOO what a ride!"

Hal

              

Happy birthday to my best friend on Thu.  No, not Mick Jagger.  It’s Alison’s birthday.

Healthcare: Can’t live with it; can’t live without it.   If you know a small business who is complaining about the high cost of healthcare, or doesn’t offer healthcare benefits because it is too expensive, please introduce me to them.  We’re understand the pain point and have a solution.

Thanks to Demetri Martin, Steven Wright and George Carlin for the inspiration for Hmmm.   I invite you to call or email me to catch up.